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The Garter Toss

Leave it to the amorous French to invent the tradition of the garter toss! According to legend, 14th-century Parisian maids would tear off pieces of the bride’s dress for good luck. The bride, not surprisingly, got tres annoyed at having her dress destroyed (and herself injured in the process). As such, the garter toss took hold as a practical compromise.

Other origin stories stress that the taking of the garter symbolized the end of the new wife’s virginity. The groom would throw his bride’s garter at male guests to distract them, and protect her purity.

Like most traditions, it became more subdued as time went by. Now it simply provides the groom and his friends their own toss time: Like your bouquet toss, all the single men participate, and whoever catches it is assumed to be the next to marry.

While the sexual overtones of the ritual are undeniable (heck, that’s the point!), be careful not to get too risqué. In the past it was common for the groom to remove the garter with his teeth, but you might want to have him take the garter off more politely… with his hands. (If the groomsmen are rowdy types, either skip the tradition, or try something a little more G-rated, like having him toss a specially made corsage.)

Garter talk.
As far as wedding customs go, the garter toss is about as popular as the groom’s cake: Some people love the idea, while others skip it. You can decide whether it’s “for you." One factor that might influence your decision is whether or not the garter is part of your something new accessories. If your garter has been given to you or has special meaning, you don’t want it flying over spilt champagne. (You can substitute a cheap one just for the toss, and have your groom remove that item from your leg.)

Etiquette dictates that the garter toss takes place immediately before the bouquet toss, so as not to upstage the bride. That means that it will likely be towards the end of the party when everyone’s feeling more relaxed, so you shouldn’t worry too much “appropriateness.” Everyone knows that it’s all in good fun anyway.

Decide on what will make you comfortable in advance, discuss with your groom how you’d like the tradition to be performed, and have a blast. Think of it as a playful way to symbolize the winding down of your reception, and the beginning of your married life.

Go Back to Traditions & Etiquette
Check Out Throwing Your Bouquet
Check Out Adults-Only Ceremonies