Asking for Money Rather than Gifts for Your Wedding

Many couples would rather receive cash on their big day as opposed to wedding gifts. Usually, it’s because they are young and would simply prefer money, or like the idea of putting “gifts” together to buy something of their choosing at a later date. While asking for cash is not considered tacky, there is a proper etiquette as to how you go about it. Just as it’s considered inappropriate to list your registry information on the invites, it’s not a wise idea to write “money, please!” when mailing out those cards.

Show me the money.
Instead, tell close friends and relatives your wish, and have them spread the news. Make sure your designated “informants” have the address handy as to where the cash should be sent, so guests don’t need to guess if it’s your old home, your new home, etc. Never have them specify an amount preferred (or mention the $10,000 Uncle Bucks wired); similar to registering, your loved ones will have different budgets, and should give the amount of cash they feel comfortable with. Also, there’s no truth to the old wives’ tale that guests should give the same amount you’re spending on them at the wedding reception. That would make a wedding a trade-off, not a celebration.

Remember, even if you prefer cash, you should always register. The reason for registering is that some guests will not feel comfortable giving money, and you don’t want to inconvenience them. On the flip side, you’ve probably saved some people a lot of time and stress, as shopping for gifts can be a huge chore. If there are absolutely no luxury items that you desire, go for something completely practical. Call a store that you frequent often and if they don’t have a set registry, see if you can have them make one for you.  Since you’ll want to consider the various budgets of your guests, the easiest way to handle it all is to have your registries posted online.

Cash advances.
Like gifts, it’s probable that some guests will arrive with cash in tow. Thank them, of course, and then give the greenbacks or checks to a designated gift-taker to put in a safe place. As for thank-you notes, follow the same procedure as registered items. Do not open the envelope when it’s given to you. At a later date, you can “take the money and run!”