Leaving Your Wedding Shower Planning to Your Maid of Honor

When it comes to your bridal shower, you have only one job: stay out of it! The wedding is your ballgame, from the hors d’oeuvres to the place cards, but the shower is another person’s battleground, namely, your shower host.

Hostess?
The bridal shower is a luncheon for your close friends and family to celebrate you and your marriage. Gifts, games and some serious girl bonding are all in order. But, like most things, the shower takes lots of planning, including phone calls, tastings, and the kinds of decisions that you have surely become accustomed to.

Usually, you do not choose the host, rather a relative or most probably your Maid of Honor volunteers. There could be one, or two, or more hosts (your bridal party, or a few aunts, etc.); she is someone close to the bride who knows how to make the day beautiful and special for her.

The guest list.
Everyone on the shower guest list must also be invited to the wedding. It is very poor etiquette to invite people to your shower, which ultimately is a pre-celebration of your wedding, and then exclude them from your nuptials. However, not every woman invited to your wedding must be invited to the shower. To avoid confusion, the host should sit down with the bride to discuss the size of the shower, whether small and intimate or an all-inclusive 50-plus affair.

Invitees typically include (from both families), depending on the size and activities:

• Mothers,
• Grandmothers/Great Grandmothers,
• Sisters,
• Aunts,
• Cousins (definitely first, but second, third, etc. are optional),
• Nieces (if old enough),
• Bridesmaids/female attendants (flower girls),
• Close friends of the brides,
• Close friends of the mothers’ (depending on your shower’s size),
• Co-workers (optional).

The invitations.
Invitations should be sent 6 weeks prior to the event. They should set the tone for the day, and alert invitees to the what, where, when and for whom. Whether your host chooses a traditional invite covered in flowers and outlined in the shape of a bride, or goes modern with bold colors, and a monogram, the following information is a must:

• Name of the bride,
• Date and time (beginning and ending),
• Location (name and address),
• The theme, if any (if the guests need to know),
• The registry,
• The RSVP number/email and date to do so by,
• Name of the host(s).

The day’s event.
After the guests arrive, have a glass of wine, enjoy a delicious lunch and indulge in dessert; the Mother of the Bride will usually give a toast, as well as the shower host.

Games can then be played to learn more about the bride and groom, and mostly so everyone laughs and enjoys the day. For larger parties, it might help to have multiple gift openers, to keep things moving along speedily. Other helpers can keep a record of who-gave-what, or create a fun hat made from the gift ribbons. It should be a fun day to celebrate with old friends, and bond with new ones.