What to Expect and How to Handle Your Wedding Reception Speeches
Once the reception gets going and everyone’s arrived and had something to eat, the Best Man traditionally gives the first speech. He’s got an important job because he needs to get everyone’s attention, and say something that’s (hopefully) meaningful. Plus, as you know, it’s never easy being first. If your Maid Of Honor wants to give a speech, which is completely optional, she should do it immediately afterward. Once she’s done, the two of you speak. After that, Moms and Dads usually chime in.
Talk of the town.
While that’s the basic order, anyone can give a speech. You can ask your relatives or other close friends to speak (if so, it’s polite to inform them ahead of time). Also, once the parents are finished, people might simply raise their hand and request the microphone.
Speechless.
For prep work, it’s a good idea to remember that long speeches tend to get a little boring, especially after the fourth one. (Think of those Oscar speeches being drowned out by the orchestra and you’ll get the idea.) Some DJ’s or band leaders will actually remind guests to wind things up if they feel the speech is rambling.
There are mixed views about whether it’s acceptable to have something written down on paper. If you can avoid it, great. But if you are that uncomfortable talking without “cue cards,” or suffer from severe stage fright, go ahead. Whatever you decide, think about what you’re going to say beforehand, and rehearse it. It doesn’t have to be Shakespeare; it just has to be from the heart.
Telling it like it is.
For your own speeches, many etiquette books and bridal magazines insist that you should never say anything cheesy or silly to your spouse. Personally, we think that’s for you to decide. If you’d really like to promise your beau that you’ll start watching ESPN more, more power to you. Contrary-wise, if you’d like to compare him to a summer’s day, sonnet onward!
Despite what you’ve seen in endless sitcoms, sarcastic or embarrassing speeches about the bride and groom are not in order; no one wants to be humiliated on their wedding day. (Besides, you had the bachelor and bachelorette parties for racy humor.) If you know you’re giving a speech, it’s wise to keep the booze to a minimum until afterward. Not only are you going to sound slurred, you’ll have the wedding video to remind you for the rest of you life that vodka and vocalizing don’t mix.