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Planning a Casual Wedding
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Enjoy a Simple, Elegant Wedding


Even if you had the dough to get married in a castle (a la Madonna and Guy), or the clout to have the entire world watch (Princess Diana), you might not want to go that nuptial route. Many brides choose to have a casual affair for any number of reasons, and when you consider all rules of etiquette that accompany wedding, whether formal, religious (Catholic, Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, Protestant...) or culturally-specific (Italian, Thai, Chinese, US South, Japanese, Same-Sex...) -- not to mention balancing family traditions with your modern perspective, it’s not hard to see why!

Simple and chic.
Generally, casual weddings start with a smaller guest list (under a hundred is good starting point) that consists of family and close friends. Some of the more common traditions that are skipped are bridesmaids and groomsmen (but not a Maid of Honor or Best Man), bachelor/bachelorette parties, and formal attire. Slim, cocktail dresses are wonderful, and different shades of white, or even another color altogether, are perfect.  Casual weddings are often in the daytime (as are many formal weddings), consist of a cocktail reception or breakfast as opposed to a full meal, and can take place anywhere from the backyard to the beach.  Another popular option for a casual wedding is to hold the reception at an intimate restaurant. It’s common to forego a band or DJ, and have a simple jazz quartet, for example, or even a single singer.

While you can also say goodbye to the Chicken Dance and karaoke, traditions that tend to remain in place are the bouquet toss (oh, heck, you know you want to), the cake-cutting, the toasts, and a father/daughter dance. Centerpieces are still a wonderful must, and Flower Girls and Ring Bearers are popular at smaller affairs.

Common cents.
Small or large, first wedding or fifth, you need to register. Even if you don’t want or expect gifts (have your Maid of Honor or close friend spread the word that you don’t want presents), people will bring them. As such, register somewhere small and convenient (a wine shop, for example), so guests will have a place to go to instead of having the extra pressure of trying to think of something on their own.  On the other hand, be aware that the more modest the wedding, the more modest the gifts, and guests tend to write considerably “smaller” checks for casual weddings.

At a small, casual affair, you can still have people do readings, write your own vows—or say traditional ones—and encourage people to throw rice, bubbles, or confetti (oh heck, you know they want to).  As long as you say “I do,” and kiss your
spouse, you’ve gone through every formal requirement necessary for a love to last a lifetime.
 
 
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8/6/2010 10:45:37 PM

How to advise the guests

My wedding will be in a restaurant at a golf course after 6:00 pm I am modern, elegant and chich. It will be our second wedding but we are excited to get married . On the invitation how will I advise the guess of what to wear. I am not planning a formal wedding but it will not be elegant. If I say semi formal I am afraid people will show up without suits and I would like to have all my guests in suits.

 
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