Wedding Traditions & Customs
The main difference between a Buddhist wedding ceremony and other religious based ceremonies is that it is centered on spiritual faith. Buddhist wedding ceremonies may seem simple at first, but actually require a good amount of planning if the Buddhist couple wants to adhere to traditional Buddhist rituals.
Are you and your partner a match made in heaven? Before you can even get engaged, your partner must first consult a Buddhist priest, or monk, to ensure that your horoscopes are compatible and that you’re a good match. If you and your partner’s horoscopes do not match up, according to the Buddhist priest, then you are asked to separate, and discontinue your relationship. If you are indeed deemed to be a good match, then your partner along with his family and priest will decide on a spiritually sound date to propose marriage.
Traditionally monks were not allowed at Buddhist ceremonies, however, in modern day Buddhist weddings they play an important role from beginning to end.
Following the proposal is a traditional betrothal ceremony called Chessian. In the Chessian, the bride’s uncle is placed on a platform, while the Buddhist priest shares Madyan with guests, which is a religious drink.
After the Chessian, the bride and groom decide where to hold the ceremony. Buddhist ceremonies typically take place in small venues, and include only close friends and family members. It is not uncommon to hold a Buddhist ceremony at the bride’s home or a temple.
On the day of the wedding the following rituals take place:
- The bride and groom are required to wear traditional Buddhist wedding garments. The bride must wear a dress called Bhaku, as well as the groom.
- A shrine honoring Buddha should be prepared at the ceremony location.
- The groom must add the bride’s dowry to the shrine honoring Buddha. The dowry typically includes fruit, tea, cake, jewelry, meat, and incense.
- A tray holding two candles should also be placed on the shrine. The couple will light the candles during the ceremony.
- A red paste is applied to both the bride and grooms foreheads.
- The ceremony begins when the couple lights the candles as well as the incense.
- Guests are asked to pour water on the bride and groom's hands. This ritual represents the blessings placed on the couple.
- The following hymns are recited: Vandana, Tisarana, and Pancasila.
- After the hymns, traditional Buddhist wedding vows are recited by the couple, which is inscribed in the Sigilovdda Sutta. The vows are as follows: "Towards my wife I undertake to love and respect her, be kind and considerate, be faithful, delegate domestic management and present gifts to please her." The bride then responds with, "Towards my husband I undertake to perform my household duties efficiently, be hospitable to my in-laws and friends of my husband, be faithful, protect and invest our earnings and discharge my responsibilities lovingly and fastidiously."
- The ceremony is concluded with Buddhist wedding readings, and blessings for the newly married couple.
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