When Dad Can’t “Give You Away”


Anyone who’s ever watched a happy bridal movie knows that Dad walks his little girl down the aisle before nervously handing her over to the husband-to-be. It’s a simple, age-old tradition, as the father of the bride is “giving away” his daughter.

In these modern times, however, you may either want to or have to re-think this decision. For starters, Dad may not be in the picture because of death, or because strained family relations could turn the aisle walk into an uncomfortable situation.  Whichever alternate escort you choose is completely acceptable in a house of worship or secular setting.

Modern brides sometimes prefer to honor both parents as equals, and walk down the aisle with a parent on either side. The Jewish faith practices this tradition, and couples of various beliefs have adopted the custom. Should that not be ideal, Mom can take over the honor, or a brother or sister, even a close friend. If friction is going to arise from having a friend or relative walk you down the aisle, you can always choose one of the ushers.  (Can’t decide which one? Go for the guy who’s height best complements you.)

German custom has the bride and groom walking down the aisle together as a symbol of their new life together. It’s a sweet idea, and, for some brides, the answer to the problem of getting parents and other relatives involved.

Finally, you can be a real showstopper and walk down the aisle solo. The spotlight will be on you and your dress, and you can even take your time and kiss some of your nearest and dearest.

Remember, it’s your day, so whatever you decide, walk like a Princes!

-David Toussaint


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